Reflection by Ibrahim
As someone who was self-diagnosed with mild depression due to Covid and online lessons in my first semester in university, here are 3 things that helped me improve my mental wellbeing throughout the past year (more of my experience could be found here) :
1. Question & Express
When you feel that you are acting up or others claim that you are too negative, weak, question why they might be saying that or why you might be acting the way they say you are. ASK as many specific questions ranging from addressing the root cause such as what affected you to remediating the situation as in what I can do to make myself feel better. To increase the effectiveness, express in whichever form is comfortable for you (talk to a close friend, journal it, rant about it in voice messages only you can see, do art). These help you to first pour out the negative feelings you might have and make you more calm and at ease. Expressing also puts out the facts for you to see and helps you understand the situation better.
2. Embark on a journey to seek some the answers (read books, hear perspectives from friends, analyze and correlate)
Having asked the right questions, expressed ourselves adequately and understood the situation better, the next step is to embark on a journey of discovery. Seek deeper answers to the questions you have posed previously. If people act the same way they did to you, investigate why they have acted as such. Perhaps they are just different or they are scared of being sucked into negativity? Or it can be in the form of an introspection of your behaviour at that particular time. It is highly likely that you acted up because you were triggered by something they said and digging deeper into that could provide insight into a similar experience into the past, suggesting a pattern. Some ways to finding the answers would be talking and garnering perspectives from your friends and reading books on self-help.
Personally for me, these really helped and I realised that I was not alone. The reassurance and the search to the big why of my behaviour led me to discover the book 'Positive Intelligence Quotient', which is the first key to understanding myself and the reasons for my recently experienced intense negativity. In the book, it explains how "saboteurs" are working against our mind, fuelling negativity and not allowing us to fulfil our true potential. A life changer indeed as applying some of the techniques listed in the book helped me lead a a happier and positive life. Another book that propelled me in understanding others around me is the book I'm reading now called 'Surrounded by Idiots', a bestseller that classifies people into 4 broad categories and many things just clicked when I read it. I finally understood why my friends, whom I felt awkward with, were as such.
Be curious about everything. Manifest that desire to understand everyone and yourself into a quest of critical inquiry. I am truly thankful for USP modules for guiding and equipping me with the knowledge to effectively inquire about the world. However, take note that it is not possible to learn everything instantly. It’s a process, a journey, a lifelong one in fact. Never give up. Everything happens for a reason. I personally believe that the events in our life are premeditated and therefore for us to learn an essential life lesson from it, that is if we stay determined in trusting the process and be open to failing and learning from mistakes. When you read anything familiar, also try to correlate it to the events in your life and see if there is anything you can do/apply back to your life.
3. Seek solace through fervent reminders from social media pages focusing on mental health
As tech-savvy youths, we spend a significant percentage of our day on social media. Instead of feeling down seeing others posting about the best versions of their life, you might want to follow mental health related social media pages. Knowingly or unknowingly, the messages these pages show tend to be very timely and relevant to the struggles we would face. When I am down and I find myself scrolling through social media aimlessly, such consoling and uplifting posts do make my day and I eventually feel better. Even though just by a bit, I feel empowered to overcome my negativity, pursue happiness and do everything I need to do to my best ability. In fact, I find it helpful to share the post that helped me so that someone who is following me and might be down could benefit from it, being inspired from how similar posts my friends previously shared have been especially helpful. Interestingly, because of this some of my friends have reached out to check in on me if I am okay, which I find very heartwarming. These create opportunities to connect with others in this busy, socially distant times, making me feel good collectively.
All in all, dealing with poor mental health is tough, that too when everyone around you gaslights you and you tend to feel alone. However, it is not the end of the world yet. There is still scope for us to upturn the situation and grow as a person, if we set our mind to it. Take comfort in knowing that everyone is amazing and the potential to achieve anything they set to as long as they are not bogged down by invincible "saboteurs". Only after understanding and discovering yourself, can you reach self- actualisation, the highest level of the Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. Of course, there is no hurry to attain this instantaneously, what is most important is how you overcame the struggles, the trauma and how it has shaped you to be the amazing person you are today. Don't doubt yourself, for no one is as powerful as you in dictating how you turn out.
Comments