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Writer's pictureUSP Batch Project 2021

Article 12: The Names That Elude Us, The Feelings Among Us

By Iyan, Zhi Yang and Grace


Cold sweat runs down your forehead. You look, terrified, at the colossal shadow that’s lurking at the corner of the room. As the shadow starts to glide over to your position, it starts getting brighter and brighter. The shadows dissipate and then coalesce to form silvery wisps that eventually merge into a smooth, shiny metal. You stare at it in a stunned fashion. Your worst nightmare has come true.


The mirror depicts YOU but is more perfect in every other way - more confident, more handsome, a better smile. There’s not even a teensy little bit of flaw that you can spot.


You groan as the memories surge into re-existence. The name of this peculiar being?


Impostor Syndrome


As your mind strains to comprehend the sheer magnitude of its existence, you start feeling more and more helpless.


What is this? How do I stop it?


Questions reverberate in your head as you desperately seek for a miracle.


Luckily, we’re here to explain!

 

IMPOSTER SYNDROME

Impostor syndrome...ahh our old friend. When times get tough and you try to muster that little bit of courage to keep you going, it pops up again and again. It tells you that you’re not enough. That others are better. That everyone will see through your “facade” soon enough. So you crumble and stumble away, hopes dashed and ultimately remain on the floor, never able to get up again.


So many of us have experienced this feeling of inadequacy; of feeling inferior to others. Despite it being a universal feeling, past and present, the term “Impostor Syndrome” was coined by Clance and Ines only as recently as 1978 during their clinical work with highly accomplished female clients who felt undeserving of their success. Despite their obvious feats of accomplishments and successes, a majority of the women felt that they were not as capable as they were made out to be.


After further research, in her 1985 paper, Clance explained that the impostor syndrome can be distinguished by six following dimensions: the imposter cycle, the need to be special or the best, characteristics of superman/superwoman, fear of failure, denial of ability and discounting praise and feeling fear and guilt about success.


In order for one to experience impostorism, at least two of the above six aspects have to be present.


The most important aspect to understand however, is the imposter cycle from which all aspects of impostorism are born.


As defined by Clance, the imposter cycle begins with an achievement-related task. When a person receives a task, negative feelings like anxiety, fear and worry start to creep in. One would react in two possible scenarios: either by procrastinating or by over-preparation.


If you react by procrastinating, you end up having to rush the work in the end. When you complete the work, there will be a brief period of relief and accomplishment though if any praise is given, it is immediately discounted. You refuse to believe that you should be praised because you believe that you did not put in the required amount of effort.


If you react by over-preparing, you will eventually attribute your success to hard work.


Hence, in either scenario, you only attribute your successes to either hard work or luck. There is no faith or trust in your personal ability. This sequence of events will serve as “reinforcement” and will eventually lead to a negative feedback loop where you will start thinking, “I am not good enough”.

 

What can I do then, you ask?


Well, the first step is to BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. It sounds cheesy but it works. You are unique. You are yourself. Whatever you have done, are currently doing and will do in future is meaningful. Nothing is inconsequential. So take pride in who you are right now!


The second step is to NOT COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS. You cannot compare your traits to others because everyone has a different combination of traits and goes down a different path. There is no point in comparing apples to oranges because they are inherently different. The same applies to you and other individuals. So be yourself!


Lastly, SPEAK UP. Never be afraid to sound out when you think you’re suffering. Look for a trusted friend, counsellor or family member. There will be someone there who can help you. A problem that’s shared is a problem divided into two. So learn to communicate and take solace in the fact that you’re not the only one facing this issue.


Now, onto the next existential crisis!

 

LEARNED HELPLESSNESS


Have you ever felt that inescapable feeling of dread, that once the gears of failure were set in motion, there was no stopping it and no control over the results?

 

In 1967, American Psychologist Martin Seligman proposed a theory that clinical depression and various mental illnesses may stem from a perceived absence of control over a situation. In other words, once we feel that something is out of our control, there is a tendency to fall into a spiral of negativity and failure.


How did he prove such an abstract concept? Well, without spoiling the specific details (if you are interested, the exact details of the study are easily accessible online!), animals that were placed in restrictive situations gave up trying to escape even when those restrictions were lifted.



Similarly, a later study placed students in two separate rooms with distracting noises during an examination. The only difference was that Group A had the ability to turn off the noise, while Group B did not. Just by virtue of having the choice in the situation, Group A performed better in the examination across the board compared to Group B despite not even turning off the noise in the first place!


 

Well, you might be wondering… This is cool and all, but how does this even relate to me?


For one, learned helplessness is something that is extremely prevalent in society, owing to the fast-paced lifestyle, failure-averse culture that dominates the Singaporean landscape. For us students, it mostly comes in the form of academics and result-oriented values.


Can you recall the first time failing a test? An exam? The biting feeling of failure that would never unhinge its jaws until you managed to prove yourself capable in the subsequent examinations. And if you failed your chance to prove yourself? Another step deeper into the hole of doubt and misery. You even think to yourself, what’s the point of trying if I’m just going to fail again? As sad as it sounds, this experience is ubiquitous.


Outside of academics, it can manifest in the workplace, finance, relationships, family and so on. The idea that we can fall into a spiral of negativity and repeated failures, leading to us even giving up trying to fix or rectify the issue, is mind-boggling and terrifying. Yet, it is all around us. Around each corner of our lives, lies the chance to encounter failure and the potential loop of helplessness that comes along with it.

 

So... How do we fix it then? How can we overcome or avoid this nightmarish condition?


Well, the truth is that we don’t really know. We’re just a bunch of students writing an article, not professional psychologists. However, what we do know is that everyone responds differently to failure and that seeking professional help is always a valid and reliable option to better understand ourselves and our plights.


What we can provide however, is the kevlar of knowing the answer. The answer to the question of what it is exactly, that haunts us in our day-to-day lives. And through that, we hope that having a name for what we feel will allow us all to better understand it, and ourselves, in the process.

 

CONCLUSION & ENDING


Cold sweat runs down your forehead. You look, terrified, at the colossal shadow that’s lurking at the corner of the room. But this time, it is no longer an inexplicable, unknown terror - Its nebulous shape begins to assume a familiar form, one that (unlike before) you are able to name.


Ah, impostor syndrome and learned helplessness. You’re back.


The shadow stops in its tracks, seemingly shocked that you found its name amidst the tangle of complex feelings that make up its shifting mass. Immediately, it appears demystified and more tamed.

As with many other parts of life, knowledge is power when it comes to caring for ourselves. Once we become cognisant and mindful of what plagues us, the once insurmountable challenge becomes a more manageable feat.


For most of us, learned helplessness and impostor syndrome may have manifested in various seasons of our lives without us consciously noticing it. In the throes of these emotions, it is easy for these feelings to consume us and obscure the psychological phenomenon behind it. Hopefully, this article can help to empower us in articulating exactly what we feel by pinpointing the psychological root at the crux of our troubles. In other words, know thy enemy.



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